Whatever Happened to… Final Fantasy VII’s Whole Darn World?

Final FantasyFirst and foremost, those who are utterly and thoroughly outraged by seventeen-year-old spoilers need to leave now. We’re going to prattle a little about the ending of Final Fantasy VII, and how thought provoking it all is.Throughout the game, you’ll detect a central theme running in tandem with the story. This theme being, “Y’know,…

January 21, 20140Comments

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What Did Video Games Teach Us in 2013? #2: Pirates Make Great Assassins

Pirates One of the biggest games of last year was a late entry indeed. Assassin’s Creed IV: Black Flag is a colossal undertaking of bowel-loosening proportions, the most ambitious freeroaming adventure since Grand Theft Auto V. It just made the cut, arriving as a launch release for the next-gen consoles and a little earlier elsewhere.It…

January 3, 20140Comments

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What Did Video Games Teach Us in 2013? #1: Wonder Trade is Not Wonderful. At All

Trade Pokémon X and Y were, tentatively, quite revolutionary for the series. The sixth generation brought us mega evolutions, which made the likes of Gengar even more bowel-looseningly terrifying than they already were. It brought us a spangly new 3D battle system, which had a kind of 'tiny Pokémon Stadium in your hands’ kind of…

December 31, 20130Comments

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Gaming Clichés We Couldn’t Live Without: Aliens Do Not Come In Peace. Ever

Aliens Sure, movies are guilty of these sorts of shenanigans too. Ever since those vast Martian deathly death-bots OF DEATH strode about the place in War of the Worlds, aliens have had a bad rap. They are not kindly extraterrestial visitors, with magical glowing fingers. They will not be right here. They are not E.T.…

December 9, 20130Comments

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Gaming Clichés We Couldn’t Live Without: Saving (Part One)

Saving Well, this time, it’s something that many of us literally couldn’t game without. Not unless the futility of beginning a several-hundred hour adventure anew each time you load up is appealing.Which it isn’t, if anyone’s keeping score. I’d rather thrust my ‘nads into a bee’s nest.But first, a nostalgic ramble. The more decrepit gameaholics…

November 4, 20130Comments

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Gaming Clichés We Couldn’t Live Without: Points and Highscores and Leaderboards, Oh My!

Gaming Just what, pray, is a ‘ gaming point’?Do points mean prizes, as many hosts of craptacular game shows have tried to convince us over the years? No. Not in any material sense. I had a hankering for that speedboat, myself, despite the unassailable fact that I live a good hundred miles from the nearest…

October 27, 20130Comments

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Gaming Clichés We Couldn’t Live Without: Survival Mode

Survival It’s just you and your stockpile of ammunition against hordes of ghastly beasts from the depths of the devil’s underpants. Well, sometimes you may be joined by a friend or two, but it’s the whole ‘alone and vainly attempting to hold back the nasties as they claw at you’ aspect that is the essence…

October 12, 20130Comments

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Spin-Offs: The Good, the Bad and the Dire: Metal Gear Rising- Revengeance

Metal Gear Since its inception in 1987, the Metal Gear franchise has had one central theme: tactical espionage action. Its studly and stubbly hero, Solid Snake, is a masterful saboteur, able to complete missions undetected while grossly outnumbered and outgunned. In short, stealthy shenanigans are key.So imagine our surprise when Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance was…

September 24, 20130Comments

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Spin-Offs: The Good, the Bad and the Dire: Mario Party

Mario Ah, Mario. You family friendly, garishly coloured party animal!The moustachioed maestro has been holding these events since 1998, arguably birthing the entire ‘minigame compilation’ genre in the process. But while so many that followed were cynical, half-assed money spinners, Mario Party is oddly engaging.Any set of minigames (which isn’t a bag of balls) needs…

September 7, 20130Comments

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Multiplayer Madness Retrospective: Streets of Rage

Streets of Rage Ah, Streets of Rage. Sega’s seminal punch-criminals-in-the-groin ‘em up. The nostalgia is strong with this one, as Darth Vader once wheezed asthmatically.This scrolling beat ‘em up franchise made its inaugural appearance on the Mega Drive/Genesis in 1991. The first game (brilliantly and melodramatically named Bare Knuckle: Furious Iron Fist in Japan) introduced…

August 20, 20130Comments

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